Category Archives: Gail Z. Martin

by | March 2, 2011 · 10:01 am

Anger and the lizard brain.

<div class=\"postavatar\">Anger and the lizard brain.</div>

by Gail Z. Martin

I’ve told the story about the two warring wolves inside each of us—the light one that is brave and true and the dark one that is dangerous.  The wolf that wins is the wolf we feed.

I tackled my own “wolf problem” when it came to feeling angry.  Now I’ve already shared my reaction to the over-hyped, over-dramatized TV news.  But once I realized how much the doom-and-gloom drumbeat of the news affected my mood, I went looking for other culprits in order to take back my wolf.
A friend of mine who is a psychologist told me that the oldest part of the brain is focused on survival.  It’s programmed to fight, reproduce and grab all the resources for itself, because that’s how wild animals survive.  Interestingly enough, this old part of the brain is what lights up when we’re angry.  And even more interesting, when we’re angry, the body redirects blood from the more advanced parts of the brain (that control logic, reasoning and decision-making) to fuel the fight-or-flight old brain.

Do you realize what that means?  When we’re angry, we’re using our lizard brain, not the new improved frontal lobe reasoning brain.  In other words—and this is important—anger turns off the ability to think.

Now consider how angry our society has become.  Road rage. Politicians who barely avoid fist fights and call each other names. Flamers and trolls on the Internet who post nasty comments.  School bullying that makes kids commit suicide.  Talk radio. Anger turns off the ability to think.
What would happen if you pulled the plug on the anger-makers?  Skip the morning drive talk radio show that leaves you with an upset stomach and a bad mood.  Stop reading the Letters to the Editor and the comments on news blogs.  Look for a non-partisan source for news that tries its best to provide the facts and let you decide.  Take time to breathe.

Anger turns off the ability to think—and it also drowns out your intuition.  When you’re angry, there are too many survival chemicals flooding your system for you to hear the soft whisper of intuition and opportunity.

Make just one change this week to pull the plug on the anger-makers and let me know how it changes your life and awakens your intuition.

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by | February 23, 2011 · 10:00 am

Which wolf are you feeding?

<div class=\"postavatar\">Which wolf are you feeding?</div>

by Gail Z. Martin

There’s an old story about a Native American grandfather who tells his grandson about the two wolves that live inside of every person.  One is a light wolf that is brave and true, and the other is a dark wolf that is dangerous and can’t be trusted.  The child asks, “Which wolf wins?”  And the grandfather answers, “The one you feed.”

With all the talk lately about civility (and lack thereof), I got thinking about the wolves we choose to feed.  I’ll make a confession—I stopped watching TV news regularly about 18 years ago.  Now that’s an odd admission from someone in the marketing and PR business, but the reason is, I realized how negative and sensationalized TV news had become since the days of Walter Cronkite and Huntley & Brinkley.

Sure, I’ll tune in for the main points of a big story, but I won’t leave it on.  Why?  I don’t want to hear all the breathless speculation (from people who don’t know more than I do on a breaking story).  Have you ever noticed how the speculation becomes more and more dire, and then moves from true speculation into “experts” predicting the worst?  And how do you feel while you’re watching that?  Tense? Angry? Frightened?

It took a toddler to make me realize how toxic TV news had become.  Once my daughter was old enough to really pay attention to conversations, she would hear enough scary stuff on the news to burst into tears.  I turned it off to avoid scaring her—and realized that I didn’t miss it, either.

Now I’m still a news junkie.  I read five newspapers online each day and subscribe to about 15 monthly magazines (and read them).   But the amazing thing is, when I read the news, I decide which stories deserve breathless coverage.  I’m not being manipulated by the fake emotions of the newscaster.  I remain much more calm, even when I’m reading about something bad.  I fed the light wolf instead of the dark one.

So here’s a challenge.  Try swapping the TV news for an online newspaper or news journal magazine for one month and see if you feel calmer.  If you can’t switch off the TV completely, mute the news and turn on the subtitles.  Try it, and I guarantee you’ll start to feel less stressed, less angry and less at the mercy of the universe.

Let me know how it works for you!

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by | February 16, 2011 · 10:00 am

How are those resolutions coming?

by Gail Z. Martin

Just a month ago we watched the ball drop in Times Square and the new year looked like a bright, shiny penny.  Resolutions for a better 2011 seemed easy to make.

Now we’re one whole month into the year, and making some of those changes seems a little harder than it looked.  That’s why I asked—and I really want to know—are you making progress on your resolutions?

Here were my resolution list for 2011?

–Make this the year I actually lose the pounds I gained “birthing” my business and books (joined Weight Watchers and I’m down 4 pounds so far!)

–Set up speaking engagements in Montreal and Toronto (I don’t know where, when or for whom, but it’s on my vision board!)  (Not yet, but I’m going to Vancouver in April, which is also on my vision board.)

–Expand the size and type of organizations for which I present workshops and keynotes (it’s starting to happen)

–Spend more time on social media reconnecting (still struggling for time to hang out as much as I’d like).

The point is not to feel guilty if you’re not already done with your list.  Hey, it’s only a few weeks!  The important thing is to keep making progress—even if it’s only baby steps—in the right direction.

We get discouraged when we compare our progress to other people’s gains (we always see their wins but not the work or obstacles they overcome), or when we get impatient with steady progress.  But the truth is, every journey covers inches before it covers miles.  It’s better to see steady slow progress than to give up entirely because the goals didn’t happen fast enough.  Hang in there!

What are your resolutions—business or personal—this year?  I’d like to know.

***My new novel, The Sworn: Book One in the Fallen Kings Cycle, is now in stores!***

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by | February 9, 2011 · 10:00 am

Bare Branches

by Gail Z. Martin

We don’t get a lot of snow here in the Carolinas, but we can get ice.  I love it when I can see every bare twig and branch glittering with ice or dusted with snow.  All of a sudden, the dry, bare, leafless branches don’t look dead or sad.  They’re alive with light, glittering like diamonds.  Until the temperature rises, all those bare trees that wouldn’t have gotten my attention are suddenly miraculous.  I’m suddenly aware of the stark beauty, the symmetry, the complexity.  Something ordinary and unremarkable is breathtaking because the ice makes me see it as if for the first time.

There are some things in my work and life that I need to re-imagine this year.  Right now, those areas seem as bare and fruitless as the branches of the winter trees.  It’s easy to look right past them.  But the ice reminds me that there is hope and beauty in waiting, and that even things that haven’t blossomed yet are worthy of appreciation for their complexity and promise.  So I will try to take a lesson from the ice and apply it to the “bare branches” in my life.

What “bare branches” do you need to re-imagine this year?

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by | February 2, 2011 · 10:00 am

Determination and Creativity

by Gail Z. Martin

I happen to love the squirrels in our backyard.  I wish I could bend like that in my Yoga class!  We have several bird feeders right outside the kitchen window, and I love to take a break with a cup of tea and watch the squirrels perform acrobatics to get to the suet cakes and bird seed.

I hope I can have the determination and creativity of the average gray squirrel this year.  Mr. Squirrel lets nothing get in his way!  If he has to hang upside-down by one toe to get a bite of corn, he does it.  Perch on a thin, wobbly garden stake?  Fearlessly.  Leap from the bird feeder to the window screen?  Without a second thought.  Wow, I need some of that moxie.  I want to be just as quick on my feet as the squirrel is (especially when he knows the dog is heading out the screen door).  I want the confidence to navigate business tightropes as gracefully as the squirrels run along the back of the fence.  I want to make leaps of intuition and take leaps of faith with the perfect balance that the average squirrel uses to jump from one flimsy branch to another.  And I want to store up enough of a cushion with my investments so I can hibernate during retirement if it’s cold outside.  Add that to my New Year’s resolutions—I want to be a squirrel!

Have you ever gotten a business or personal insight from something in nature?  Please share!

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by | January 26, 2011 · 10:00 am

Insights from Nature

by Gail Z. Martin

During the summer, our backyard is a lush garden.  At this time of year, it’s just a shadow of its former glory.  Sometimes when I look out the window, I feel sad because what’s left is scrubby and pale.  I feel that way on bad days about life in general, too.  Some days it just seems like the color has been leeched out of everything.  Then I remember the garden.  I know we’ve planted dozens of tulip and daffodil bulbs out there.  Many of them came from my late mother-in-law’s garden, so they are a wonderful reminder of what a strong, loving woman she was and how important an influence she was in my life.  I can’t see those bulbs right now, but come spring, they’ll be fantastic.  Most of the plans are perennials, so although they look scrubby now, they will be amazing when it warms up.  I try to remind myself that although on certain days I feel far away from the results I want to accomplish, in reality, the seeds and bulbs have been planted and in due time they will blossom, just like the garden in the backyard.

Have you ever gotten a business or personal insight from something in nature?  Please share!

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by | January 19, 2011 · 10:00 am

My Resolution List for 2011

by Gail Z. Martin

Happy New Year!  I actually love the whole New Year thing—New Year’s Eve, resolutions, and especially the Tournament of Roses parade.  Ever since I was a kid, I have loved to sit on the couch (preferably in jammies) and watch the Tournament of Roses while I drink a morning cup of hot chocolate or coffee.  What a beautiful and hopeful way to start a brand new year!

And while I’m as imperfect as everyone else at keeping all my New Year resolutions, I enjoy making them, because they encourage me to be better than I would be otherwise.  The big resolutions also make their way onto my vision board, and those have an uncanny way of coming true.

So what’s on my resolution list for 2011?  Here are a few items—

–Make this the year I actually lose the pounds I gained “birthing” my business and books

–Set up speaking engagements in Montreal and Toronto (I don’t know where, when or for whom, but it’s on my vision board!)

–Expand the size and type of organizations for which I present workshops and keynotes

–Spend more time on social media reconnecting

So I’ll put these out to the universe and work behind the scenes to make them happen.

What are your resolutions—business or personal—this year?  I’d like to know.

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by | January 17, 2011 · 9:00 am

Welcome!

Welcome to Big Dreams and Hard Work!  This blog is dedicated to business owners, entrepreneurs, visionaries and authors who are committed to doing the hard work necessary to see their big dreams come true.

We’ll cover all kinds of topics related to success—marketing, self-awareness, networking, sales tips and more.  Our slant on things is a little different—we take an intuitive approach to business, emphasizing personal relationships, networking, and community.

Meet the blogger:

Gail Z. Martin is a bestselling author, international speaker and entrepreneur.  She owns DreamSpinner Communications and is the “Get Results Resource” for marketing strategies that work.  Gail is the author of The Thrifty Author’s Guide to Launching Your Book (Comfort Publishing) and 30 Days to Social Media Success (Career Press). You can find her online at www.GailMartinMarketing. Gail is also the author of the bestselling Chronicles of the Necromancer fantasy adventure series (The Summoner, The Blood King, Dark Haven, and Dark Lady’s Chosen) published by Solaris Books and distributed by Simon & Schuster.  Her new series, The Fallen Kings Cycle, will be released by Orbit Books in 2011.  Gail blogs every Wednesday.

In addition to our regular bloggers, we’ll be hosting a lot of guest bloggers, especially the amazing and dynamic professionals who have been guests on the Shared Dreams Marketing Podcast.  We’ll revisit their podcast interviews and expand on the knowledge they share with bonus blog info.  Look for guest bloggers every Tuesday.

Freebie Fridays!  Every Friday we’ll have links to great free downloads from our three main bloggers and from our guests.  Articles, ebooks, audios, videos—you never know what it will be, but it’s guaranteed to be great for growing your business!

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